After the wedding

Make no mistake about this Family is everything,

watching a generation emerge and groomed is a blessing

All these cant happen legitimately without you saying "i do".

Do you know that, like an apprentice,

you are being prepared, all your life ,

for the moment you will be responsible for a family,

the happiness of a people - your parents, in laws, wife,

children and community?

But this reality become tangible

at the point you find that one person you cannot live without

You deploy your wealth of acquired skills

In wooing her and convincing her parents that you are well groomed

Every training and skill you have acquired come to interplay

Then every resources is deployed

to make the wedding ceremony a success

but after the euphoria of the wedding comes the marriage

While you see her beauty, swag and poise

before and during the wedding

You get to see her untidy and unkempt early morning looks afterwards

Believe me that guy u see as so fresh and clean

may have a room of sweaty, smelly clothes

The soft-spoken, angelic and obedient girl you dated

 can become forceful, domineering and uncooperative

And like a well packaged gift, you get to experience

the true nature of your spouse after the packaging has been unwrapped.

That becomes "your moment of truth"

All the statement of "i love u die" "i cant live without u"

get tried by the fire of quarrels, strife, disagreements and opposition

not leaving behind negative interference and bad advise.

This is the point where the chaff of emotions and

sentiment get filtered and the true value and

belief you place on your union get unraveled

"if you fail in the day of adversity, your strength is small"

Anyone who tells you that his/her wedding dint go through

this phase definition, refinement and redefinition

is the father of all liars

if you could go out of your way to make your wedding a reality,

why can't you give your all to make your marriage work?

My father once said "You see your mother as a saint

cos you are not privy to her shortcomings

If I tell you half of what I have to go through on a daily basis and

she says hers too, you will probably not get married"

P.S: They have been happily married for over 45Years

Marriage is a calling

Parenting is a full-time profession

To live in peace with another you must let go of yourself

To raise a happy family you have to constantly work at it

To be a provider you have to give "all of yourself" and more

To be a successful parent you need to understand that

you are not just training a child but indoctrinating a generation

If you aint ready to do all of the above, and more, marriage aint for you

Cos really after the euphoria of wedding ceremony comes, the task of marriage