Discover to Recover

Life can be so unpredictable

Especially from the physical, natural realm

It can get rosy one time yet full of thorns

Pure at another though surrounded by mire

Sometimes so dark you could taste the blackness

Chaos in the midst of calm.

Your ability to keep sanity, calmness and your cool

Comes from a conviction deep within of who you are

And what your abilities are with respect to your God-given Destiny

I will continue to reiterate these facts till its understanding sinks in

The world will never stand still cos you are hurt

Why go around with a long face as if the more pity you get

the easier it is to resolve the issues

the fact remains that most of those who appear to be sympathetic

would turn around and mock you behind ur back

so why make your personal problems a reference point?

No matter what you feel you are going through

Someone's been through worse and

Someone else is facing his own cross right now

While going through his day cheerfully without moodiness

Your happiness should not be dependent on situations around you

Cos like the weather they are so unstable

It should be based on your conviction of who you are

What your calling is and a knowledge of your destination in destiny

Imagine the President crying on National TV

over a crisis he is expected to handle

How would you feel if your MD told you

how many times the company came close to bankruptcy?

Imagine your pastor breaking down on the alter and

complain about his family problems or

Do you think he doesn't encounter some?

One of the quality of a good leader is

the ability to remain calm in the midst of chaos and

to transmit calmness to his followers.

But how would he develop this trait

if he goes about complaining about his little, daily crisis?

Some peeps complains to any and everyone available

Throughout their adult life

Feeling like they are the only ones with trials

The truth is there is nothing you are facing as an adult/ a parent

That your parents dint face

Yet they raised you to be whatever you think you have become

So stop complaining and RESPOND with ABILITY

to that situation, crisis or trials cos

That's what RESPONSIBILITY is about

But how would you respond with ability

If you are not aware of your ability?

As the year winds up dear friends

I want to say this

In spite of the trials you faced this year

No matter what you lost

You can recover all if you will only discover your abilities

And be convinced about your God-given destiny

Therefore, i implore y'all

DISCOVER to RECOVER

                  ......Storms from a quiet heart.....

Wishes....

There are so many things i wished for

Wished i could turn back time

I would have done it differently,

Change my past and make my life better

Wish my nose was bigger

Wish i was a bit fairer

Wish i was a little bit slimmer

I would love to be a bit taller

While i am wishing all these someone is wishing the exact opposite

It's amazing that at one point u wished for something

Soon  you are wishing for the exact opposite of what you wished for

For example

In Primary 3, i wished to be in Secondary School

When i got into the Secondary school and

faced punishment from seniors and teachers

I wished i was still in Primary school

As a teenager i wished i was all grown-up

and responsible for my upkeep

Now as an adult i wish i was still that kid

who cares about nothing but reading, eating and attending school.

We wish for the good life

Riding in posh rides and living in mansions

But make no mistake about it

Those, you envy, in that position are not finding it funny either

I know of a star who said he wish he wasn't so popular

Wish he could go back to the days he would just stroll

down the street to buy "fries" (akara and fried yam)

It's amazing that we lack the capacity to

maintain nor acquire most things we wish for

I wish for a private jet

But do you know how much you would

pay to keep it in an hanger for a year?

You want a loving girl, do you have what it takes to

 get so emotionally involved so as to win her heart totally?

I started wishing for a car at age 12

Could remember the car vividly it was a Volkswagen Jetta Saloon car

How did i plan to get it? Like more than 80 million others, Promo from 7up

Now it seems more feasible for me to BUY a Car, not WISH for one.... why?

I have a well-paid job and can afford it.

Life is not a game of chess

It is a set of defined rules, law and principles e.g.

If you sow, you will reap

If you invest, you will get returns

Whatever you do not prepare for

You would miss and even when you get them, misuse

Imagine that God gave me all i wished for

A car at 12,

The death of my Primary School teacher

Who flogged BODMAS into my skull

To become a 20graudate at 18

A manager at 21, Married at 23

Would have been so funny.

Friends i know there are so many things

 we would wish to change

A lot we want to forget

Steps we wish we dint take

And mistakes we all regret

But dwelling on them and wishing we could change time

Is a luxury we do not have

It is a trick from hell to keep us in bounds

No matter what that situation is

You can get up, like a child who fell

Dust yourself and move ahead.

I understand that sometimes it is not that easy

But fellows with conscious effort and practice you will get there

Dwelling on that situation would only shorten your life span

And keep you in perpetual bondage

Do not throw your future away over the mistakes of your past

Keep moving forward.

Instead of wishing to change your past

Get a hold of your today and shape your tomorrow

Into that glorious future you once dreamt of

Anything is possible if you can only believe, not wish.

Let your belief drive you into actions

Stop brooding over your loss

Sit-down and plan your recovery

You might be amazed that the loss is what you needed,

God design to move you into a better place.

Wishes are for Daydreamers

Illusions for the depressed and desperate

Achievements comes when you act

Stop your wishes

Up your Beliefs in a better tomorrow and

ACT!

Grow...

There's this misconception among Gods children

That storms, trials and pain comes as Gods punishment for

Sin and disobedience or as Gods means of trying our faith

But i implore you to look at it from a Parents perspective

Would you as a parent starve your child in order to toughen him up?

Would you throw him into the fire in order to test the strength of his skin?

It's true that sometimes we suffer cos of our disobedience and wrong-doing

But how are we supposed to learn if we don't fall and fail?

God isn't trying to discover who you are by trying you

Remember that before you were born God knew you

He is not trying to know you. He understands you more than you can ever imagine

I believe that everything that happens to one in Life is geared at making him Grow

Friends take a time and consider how a seed grows

It firstly have to contend with its own shell

Break free from itself and just at the point it surpasses that stage

It discovers that it is surrounded by the darkness, rocks and soil,

Another task to be overcome.

Gradually it pries its way through rocks, dirt and soil and

Even when it breaks out to the surface

It has to contend with wind, rain, sun, heat and cold

But soon

That fragile, tiny steam builds resistance to these factors and

become a tree strong enough not just to support itself but others also

and even provide food for many.

The problem with us is we refuse to learn from nature

We get so much engrossed with ourselves that we fail to realize

that for you to grow you have to first break free from yourself and loose shell.

Consider this

Every seed goes through the same process of growth

But at the point they face the weather, storms and wind

Some build up some form of resistance for a short period and give up

becoming sheaves of millet whose relevance lasts for less than a year

While others continue to build resistance to whatever comes their way

throughout their lifetime and become an Iroko whose relevance lasts for decades.

I have never seen an infant who just stood up and started running

He first sits to strengthen his waist,

Crawls to fortify his knees and stands to strengthen his spine

Before moving one step at a time.

Have you noticed that for each of the steps enumerated above

The child through falling learns how to keep his balance?

If he stops trying after the fall of sitting how would he stand?

If he stops at standing how would he run?

Note

The pain a child experiences at a higher stage of his development

is greater than that of the former yet he pushes on and

as a parent you would never stop him going through these process

All you can do is guide him through each stages of his Life

It becomes disappointing when your child keeps crawling

while he should be running and no matter how big he appears

he is considered not to be developing

 So

Why do storms, trials and pain come?

It is a process that measures our progress and gives definition to our growth level.

Everyone faces some form of a storm

What differentiates us is the ones we overcome

Stop being a disappointment to God through complains

Don't be afraid to Grow

Face your Storms for today,

GROW!

Secret Truths Open Lies Pt.1

Why we choose to live in the shadow of lies
Gets so creepy that the heart gets overwhelmed
We get so engrossed in lies so much that the truth seems farfetched
Yet we hope for the best while we get entangled and
remain in wrong-doing Finally we blame everyone
but ourselves when the inevitable, due to our actions, happen.
I will get to guys in the part2 of this write up but for now  
Ladies listen
Guys are sick and tired of you forming a general perspective of us
From information you gathered by either listening to peers
Who would only give you information that justifies them
While glorifying their shortcomings or
From peeping at us through the keyhole of your mindset
Instead of opening the doors of your heart and
walk into our world
Yes I know you have been told from age eight that Guys are wicked, lousy,
insincere and stupid
Though some of those facts have been verified over time
But think about this in all sincerity. Who isn’t?
We are only human and can never be perfect in this flesh
I am also aware that some guys wear their own foolishness like a crown
I am not trying to justify them
But please Ladies
Get a hold of this truth and let it register in your mind.
You cannot be bigger than your thoughts
Cannot see beyond your vision and dreams
Your life will continually tow the path you chart and
Except by divine intervention
You cannot walk a wrong path continuously
and arrive at the right destination  
If you are single and feel your time is ticking or
time is now of the utmost importance
Take a time out and evaluate your mindset, your perception your belief
I learnt something from every relationship I lost
And that is If you can sit down after a failed relationship and
Evaluate why the relationship failed, don’t just do this yourself
Talk to those who are more experienced than you are
Being careful to present the fact as it is,
not being economical with the truth
You will discover what you did wrong
Only then will you be able to make amends and move on
Understand this If different guys you dated
complained about a particular trend in your behavior
Which they perceived as appalling,
Then it is high time you decide to make amends and tell yourself
that the problem was not from the guys  
Think about this
We always hear “he left me cos he wasn’t ready for commitment”
“Guys are always afraid to commit and settle down”
Still thousands of Ladies say “I Do” every Saturday
Question: Are they getting married to Ladies, like themselves? Hell No!
That guy you think is not ready to settle down is now happily married
Yet you will give the excuse that he got snatched away
Please instead of whining ask yourself what the other lady has
That you lack and strive to acquire it cos funny as it seems
the other lady might not even be half as pretty as you are
So what is the problem?
I will try my best to highlight some views from a guy’s perspective  
Please dear ones
Understand that there are certain peculiarities in every guy
No two guys reason alike, behave alike or want same things
So what you think appeals to one, might be disgusting to the other
That said let’s get down to business
Most guys would date anybody from a club freak,
no home staying and always flexing babe
I even know guys who dates Prostitutes
But when it comes to settling down, it’s a different ball game
Then he is thinking of someone he can DEPEND on
Yea I know some of you are shocked,
An egoistic African man DEPENDENT? Yes I said so
As shocked as you may feel, I tell you IT IS THE TRUTH
Find out from ladies who are married and  
Are enjoying a blissful home they will tell you
that their hubby is a big Baby
A big sis once told me that when
she looks at the way her hubby Commands respect and
admiration from people outside
She can only smile cos they will never know that
Few hours before, he was in tears and related his fears to her
In her own words she said
“They would never know how many liters of his tears my shoulders bore
Nor the number of nights I had to cuddle him.
Seems we have forgotten the saying that
“Behind every successful man, there is a woman”
I would love to rephrase that
“Behind every successful man, there is a virtuous woman”
Men are created to be dependent
but they can only depend on you If you earn their trust
Most guys you see as composed, organized and in sync with themselves
Are disorganized, disoriented and confused 85% of the time
It takes a Lady with a good head to put him in check It’s amazing to note that
Most men who keep late nights and Chill at bars and food spots go there
sometimes cos they feel at home with
The woman who owns the bar, her sales girl or her daughter and
you will be amazed to hear the kinda things he discusses with them.
That is not to say that we enjoy being pushed around or
A woman who is bossy
Simply put.
We want someone to fill our mother’s role without issuing commands  
See no matter how much a man loves grooving and flexing
He does not want to marry an always grooving, club freak. Why?
One, no matter how much you think we trust you
We always worry about you getting carried away
In the heat of the moment and moving with the flow
Secondly, it is not economically wise  
Ladies the phrase “I Love you just the way you are” is a Blatant lie.
Never fall for it If it is true why does
he buy you hair extensions, wigs,
jewelries and encourage you to look good?
It is only a guy who really cares about you
And thinks you have a place in his future
Who would look beyond your looks
Push you to defining your dreams and
assist you to actualize them
Except when the guy is decades older than you and
Feels that you leaving the house is a vulnerability
Therefore if your spouse complains about something,
anything which would be of benefit and advance you,
adjust now before you lose him
Cos no matter how much he loves you
Once his complains turns to nagging and u seem not to care
His love would die and he would see no reason to stay.  
Understand this
Every guy wants to feel proud, just like ladies,
introducing his spouse to peeps
Not just as a pretty face but also as a resourceful person
I understand that everybody cannot be a graduate but
Education does not only end in school and
Classrooms are not only present in the university
If you can’t become a university graduate,
Learn a trade, make yourself resourceful
Then and only then will you stop looking for
the next guy to pay your bills
There are so many non-graduates who are millionaires
Stop sitting on your ass and GO GET A LIFE!  
Ladies I get cynical when I hear you guys say
“I don’t want to marry a guy who is attached to his family”
One Lady said to me “she would prefer to marry an orphan”
You guys forget that if a guy is detached from his present family
(His Father, Mother and siblings)
He would also be detached from his future family
(You, his wife and his children)
Ladies please get your priorities right!
Even if your hubby is so attached to his mother or
Your mother-in-law is troublesome
Ask yourself this question: how many more years does she have to live?
Will you throw away your joy and
Life over someone who is already wrapping up theirs?  
If all you do while dating a guy is discover ways for him to spend
Then you have just labeled yourself “unmarriageable”
Make no mistake about it
every guy dreads going Bankrupt than going to hell
If you portray an unhomely,
Disorganized and confused disposition
It is a huge turn-off for the guy
cos he begins to see you like himself, A man!
He might act like he doesn’t care at first but
Mark my words. Soon he will be bothered
If you doubt me
Ask married friends to make a list of things
Their hubby Dint care about while they were courting
Which causes a rift now that they are married
You will be amazed
It is true that “he who finds a wife, finds a good thing” but
Virtue is all about disposition, composure and poise
Anything short of these is mediocrity  
If you want your life to take a different tow, think differently
Act differently, Love differently and live
Believe me If it is too good to be true, then it is not true
Real relationships can never be perfect, perfect relationships aint Real
Always read between the lines choose reality over illusions
That is the only way you will discover  
The Secret Truths and Open Lies.

Dependent Independence

Every October 1st We Celebrate

With Loads of activities

Street walks, marching and chanting

It is like a carnival.

Over the years,

The  relevance of our celebration has been quashed

Such that, it now means different things to different people

To the working class it's just another holiday

To the traders an extension of the weekend sales

To the politicians another opportunity to propose and

Approve bogus budget for celebration,

Another avenue for embezzlement.

To the Government of the Day

Another opportunity to list out projects that would never be completed

State Progress that's bleak and promise of a future better imagined

Think about this

Why do we celebrate independence?

Is it just another day to remind the west that we seem to be free?

Why was it celebrated by our founding fathers?

How is it celebrated in well meaning countries?

On July the 4th 2012,

President Obama after saluting members of the United States Armed Forces

Said and I quote

"You serve under a proud flag.

You and your families sacrifice more than any of us can ever know,

in defense of those God-given rights that were first put to paper 236 years ago......

The Nation will always be there for you as you have been there for us"

He went further to appreciate Specific,

Low ranking officers who performed the exceptional and

suffered varying degree of loss For example

Petty Officer Taylor Monis, Sgt. Alan Ruechs and Corp. Alex Nguyen.

To America 4th of July is regarded a sacred day

A day of reflection not only for the Government but its citizenry

It is a day every American is called to Service

While the contribution of those in service is enumerated and appreciated

A day the Nation stands in Pride of its achievements so far

What has Nigeria as a Nation Achieved that is worth Celebrating?

The undeserved Title: The Giant of Africa

Please Do not get me wrong

I am neither trying to make jest of our Celebration nor

Castigate our Government for their insensitivity and Lack of regard for its citizen

I am just thinking out Loud!

October the 1st is declared our independence

My question is this

How independent are we

When our Economic policies is just an extension of IMF and World banks Ideas

Ideas which do not put into consideration

The millions living in make-shift homes and the destitute?

How independent are we

When we still depend on Foreign investors

While chocking up our indigenous companies with taxes, levy's and duty?

We are quick to lure foreign investors with

Tax free zones, duty free goods, percentage cut on taxes and so on

How independent are we

When we spend Millions of Naira on treatment of political office holders abroad

While neglecting our hospitals?

We spend billions on Scholarship of select individuals abroad

While suffocating our educational system

Our Government hardly embark on a project without foreign aids and Grants

Yet we boast of savings in foreign banks in the name of reserves.

What is the relevance of our independence

When despite living in abject poverty

Our economic team continually inform us that the economy is improving

Stating parameters which do not relate to the common man.

Our Youth, the bedrock of our Productive capacity,

Run to foreign lands in search of greener pastures

Doing odd jobs and enslaving themselves

The American Visa Lottery, an avenue of modern Slavery

Is being celebrated in Nigeria.

I was heartbroken the day i read in the dailies

that hundreds of our Ladies were being deported from Mali for Prostitution.

In my Opinion

Until our Government begin to enact policies geared towards alleviating poverty

Not putting into consideration the views of our task masters, THE WEST.

When we stop depending on medical care Abroad

When we encourage our local manufacturers and

Stop lobbying the Lebanese, Stingy Cheap Labor-finding Chinese and

Broke-ass Indians In the name of Foreign Investors

When we stop building other Nations economy and 'Revolutionalise' our educational sector

Instead of sending selected few abroad in the name of Scholarships

In fact

Till our Economic Growth is measured by our

Gross Domestic Product Per Capita and Per Capita Income

We are

DEPENDENT IN OUR INDEPENDENCE

......... My Dependence is in God...............